Around about August last year I was seeing a guy who, one day showed me a picture that one of his ex girlfriends had posted to Instagram, the picture was of her in a lace bralette, he went onto say that he found this to be "slutty" and indirect tweeted about how he thought it wasn't classy of her. At the time inside my head I was admiring both how she looked in the bralette and also her confidence, but I timidly nodded my head in agreement regardless. Funnily enough a couple of weeks later he uploaded a picture of himself to Instagram, completely topless, with one hand holding onto his crotch. Now, whilst most people can probably tell that things did not work out with this guy and somebody should probably sit him down and tell him that it is not ok to speak about females in that way (because trust me, there was more where that came from) and of course I know that not all males have this thought process or are this way inclined, hell I know some females that would still bash other females for posting a cheeky bra pic. But we, as females should not be judged for doing the exact same thing that is perfectly, seemingly normal and acceptable for a male to do. Everyone remembers the whole JB getting praised for his ripped bod and Miley Cyrus being bashed for showing the exact same amount of skin right?

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But what I really wanted to touch on here is that there's also something to be said for people like me, who have sometimes agreed in silence and don't speak up because they're afraid of too being seen as a "slut". In the situation I've mentioned above, I knew what was right, I knew what I should have said to him in reply, I should have stood up for this girl. But I didn't because I was too afraid of what he would think of me for thinking what she was doing was perfectly alright. 

I've also seen bloggers shoot beautiful, ethereal and admirable posts of themselves in some new (very pretty) lingerie, whether that was because they were part of a campaign with a brand or they were speaking about their own body confidence, does just the fact that the pictures are of these women in their underwear, make them a "slut"? We all know whats under there, we're not primary school children and I just want to know why if a woman feels good enough about herself in a society filled with body shaming, name calling and bashing left right & centre, to showcase that where she may like, why should that not be celebrated instead of shamed? 

I can't stop looking at this picture and thinking about how awkward it would have been if the person who lives in that house came out and found me posing outside their front door lmao.

True, there may be a line that should probably be drawn between living your life in your truest self, as a female, doing whatever you want, wearing whatever you want, and well, posting HD pictures of your actual vagina to Instagram, which I have never actually seen anyone do but, I think that may class as porn. If you have that LBD on and you're feeling yo self, you're about to go OUT out and the size of your cleavage decides to not coincide with your actual dress size and it's boobie central (I do not have this problem, but I have friends in bigger boobed places). If you've got it, flaunt it, and whoever's dirty uncle Albert is staring at you from the bar is not your problem. Just because you look good, and most importantly you FEEL good about yourself, and snippets of your natural body parts may be on show, it doesn't mean your intention is to have sex with everyone in the room. 

I knew a girl at my old work place who told me once that it was a hot summers day, she was out for a bike ride with her family, she wore a skirt and this car slowed down behind her, a man rolled down his window and whistled at her and her own dad said to her "well that's what you get for wearing a skirt". We can all hope and pray for ourselves, for our children and for our children's children, but I'm honestly not sure if at least in this life time we'll ever live in a world where certain men don't stare, or wolf whistle at you whilst you're just trying to walk home from work, or pull over in their van by my 16 year old sister who's waiting at the bus stop, just to tell her "coorr look at that" and wink at her, or label women as "sluts" for celebrating themselves on social media. They're probably always going to be there, which is really sad, but the least we can do as females is stick up for each other or speak up if we think someone has said something that makes you stop and think "hang on a second, that's not quite right". Sure, everyone's entitled to their own opinion, but I for one don't have time for remarks that should be kept away in the sexist department of the filing cabinet. 

"Any woman who chooses to behave like a full human being should be warned that the armies of the status quo will treat her as something of a dirty joke. She will need her sisterhood."


To end this post, let's just take a moment of appreciation for this pink, satin, ruffles galore blouse I discovered in the Topshop sale a couple of weeks ago for £7!! It was the only one of two left in my size, I think that's what they mean when they talk about true love and "meant to be's". Happy Tuesday, don't forget to spread some love.

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